What is financial abuse? Signals, reports and recovery (2023)

Types of financial abuse

Although not as well known as other forms of abuse, it is very common and can play a crucial role in serious situations. RespectivelyPennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence, financial abuse occurs in 98% of abusive relationships and plays an important role in preventing victims from escaping these situations.

"This is the number one reason battered women and men don't leave their partners," Mary Joye, a licensed mental health counselor who has helped people get out of financially abusive situations, told Annuity.org. “They don't have enough money to go. This person usually makes sure that you don't have enough money to leave.

did you know

Financial abuse occurs in 98% of abusive relationships

The warning signs of financial abuse can vary depending on the specific situation. It's also important to remember that financial abuse often increases over time.

It could start with something as simple as a small request for money or giving up a little control. But it can grow over time and eventually lead to a victim.

A better understanding of the warning signs can help prevent a situation from getting out of hand.

Few groups are more at risk of financial abuse than seniors.

Seniors can be easy targets for financial abuse, especially those unfamiliar with modern technology, battling conditions like dementia, or unable to care for themselves.

Abusers can include scammers and people who try to contact seniors to steal their money. This can take the form of unsolicited phone calls or emails that trick seniors into making a nefarious investment or thinking they are sending money to a family member when in fact they are a scammer.

Unfortunately, caregivers can also be a serious source of financial abuse among older adults. Older people who require regular assistance or are unable to fend for themselves can become victims of their carers, who may refuse to provide care if they do not receive or control the older person's money.

Denying older people access to care can land them in desperate situations where they have to give money to a perpetrator.

Family members sometimes commit financial abuse as well. When a family member takes control of an older person's finances that they can no longer manage on their own and starts stealing that money, it is a form of financial abuse.

Financial abuse can also occur in marriages and relationships and become an integral part of domestic violence situations.

Money is a daily necessity and abusers use it to gain control over their victims. By gaining control of the couple's economy, the abuser manages to deprive the victim of her independence and make it difficult for her to get out of the situation.

"They have this 'what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine' mentality," Joye said. “If you feel like you're suffering and they're doing well financially, there's an imbalance of power there. It tends to be a power play and control mechanism.”

Examples of financial abuse in a relationship

In addition to controlling your spouse's access to money, abusers can go further and prevent you from getting or keeping a job.

On the surface, financial abuse may appear to be about stealing money, but not having access to finance can quickly lead to a complete loss of control over one's life.

It's not always easy to know if a loved one is being financially abused. In some situations, the victim themselves may not even realize it, as some stalkers can be very effective at covering up what they are doing.

Some abusers know how to discourage a victim from seeking help, whether through frequent mood swings or unexpected lavish gifts, so they don't become too suspicious.

"They can seem generous if they're really just trying to calm you down enough to keep you locked up," Joye said.

But there are still signs from loved ones and relatives to pay attention to.

For those in relationships who may experience financial abuse, an important sign to look out for is how they are managing money and their financial situation. If the spouse presents themselves as an authority figure rather than an equal, it could mean that something is wrong.

did you know

Nearly 80% of Americans do not recognize financial abuse as domestic violence.

“When you start to see someone suffer or someone says, 'Oh, I can't do this because John won't let me, I can't do this because Sally won't let me.' These are adults. If an adult won't let you do something or buy something, then something is wrong."

Another sign is when you notice that a family member needs to ask their spouse's permission to make small daily purchases or when it comes to an allowance.

Family members should also be aware of any financial imbalance within the couple.

“If you see the husband driving a new Tesla and the wife driving an old car or vice versa, there are some signs,” Joye said.

For family members of seniors who may be at risk of financial abuse, it is important to keep an eye on their finances and their caregivers.

If you find that your family member's bank account has had large withdrawals or many small withdrawals added over time without a clear explanation, it could mean that something is wrong.

Also, if your family member contacts someone you don't know by phone or email offering you questionable business or investment opportunities, it could be an attempt to steal your money.

The hard truth is that getting out of financially abusive situations can be very difficult. Perpetrators can do whatever it takes to keep victims from leaving.

Financial abuse is not as widely understood as other forms of abuse, so friends and family may be less aware that something is going on.

But there are ways for victims to escape these situations.

Depending on the severity of the circumstances, there are domestic violence hotlines available that may offer assistance or resources. If financial abuse is used to keep the victim in a physically abusive situation, the police should be contacted.

Victims may also turn to family or friends who can take them in and support them for a time while they recover or rebuild their own finances.

One important thing to remember when trying to get out of a financially abusive situation is that giving up control of your money forever to get out can be risky or harmful.

“You have to have an exit strategy, and part of that is money,” Joye said. “It's very frustrating when I hear customers say, 'I'll give you anything.' I just want out. But then when they leave, they don't have money for an apartment.

Rebuilding your finances after financial abuse can be challenging, but it's far from impossible. have a strong understanding offinancial educationcan help you make the right decisions to start building your own financial security.

In the short term, friends or family can help you recover. There are also many domestic violence shelters that can provide temporary housing.

After that, it's important to secure a job and develop your own cash flow that goes directly to you.

Increased finances may initially require a lower standard of living. But giving yourself the chance to build a nest egg on your budget whenever possible and saving as much as possible makes a world of difference when it comes to achieving financial independence.

It is important to report financial abuse if you suspect it is occurring, as it can often be related to domestic violence situations.

One of the easiest ways to report is to contact a domestic violence hotline. Depending on the situation, you may also contact the police directly.

professional advice

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 800-799-7233.

When trying to report financial abuse, one of the first steps is to record what you think is happening and gather evidence if you can. After that, you can report the abuse.

It may also be helpful to remove the victim from the situation before reporting to ensure that the abuser does not harm or retaliate against the victim.

It is important to remember to take action if you think you are aware of a financial abuse situation. Victims cannot always escape these situations on their own.

If you find yourself in a situation of financial abuse, there are many resources available that can help you.

Remember, the domestic violence hotline is 800-799-7233.

If you need to get out of a situation right away and you don't have the financial means, there are shelters all over the country that can provide you with free housing.

DomesticShelters.orghas a simple search feature to help you find options near where you live.

oNational Network to End Domestic Violencecontains resources and information on financial abuse and information for friends and family on how to help victims escape these situations.

oNational Domestic Violence HotlineThe site offers many resources and information, including ways to get help and what to do when you're out of the picture. The site also includes easy-to-search access to local resources.

If you are looking to rebuild your finances after getting out of the situation, there are free financial counseling options available to you.

oFinancial Planning Associationprovides free financial counseling to low-income individuals and survivors of domestic violence.

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  joy of mary

  Licensed Mental Health Counselor

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